1.7.1-Sarah1281
Brick!Club 1.7.1 Sister Simplice Apparently we need to do this chapter because otherwise we will not understand the gossip at some point in the future in M-sur-M. Never mind that gossip is evil and kills people. Hugo is choosing to enable these murderers now. Oh dear, if these circumstances are so improbable that we must be warned about them and not anything else that has happened then I’m not even sure I can deal with it. Madeleine is going to visit Fantine every day in the afternoon and lying to her about going off and doing something about her child. That’s nice of him. I do wonder why all the sisters have to use such weird names. I mean, I know this is a book full of Cosette’s and Fantine’s but this is ridiculous. Sister Perpetue and Sister Simplice. I do not feel comfortable shipping her with anyone because of the fact she’s a nun. I’m kind of annoyed at this remnant of my Catholic upbringing. But hey, could be worse. Lane from Gilmore Girls rebelled against everything about her strict very religious upbringing until she was about to have sex with her boyfriend and could only mutter “No sex until AFTER marriage.” Sister Perpetue is apparently the definition of this just being a job. So I guess if Valjean’s nieces didn’t starve to death they could all go out and be nuns instead of prostitues. Nuns have it rough in Hugo’s universe but they are less likely to die. Sister Simplice had never been young and would never grow old. I’m suddenly reminded of Baptistine. Simplice is austere and cold and we cannot call her a woman? That does not sound good, Hugo. She never lied? If Javert were not traumatized by breasts and she was not a nun, Simplice/Javert could totally become a thing. Telling a lie is the greatest evil? That’s…not even close to the truth. Or the bishop really screwed himself over saving Valjean from prison for those eight years and should have sent him packing. And Valjean would have been fine stealing from everyone in sight and actually robbing people with violence so long as he had not broken parole or lied about it. What, was this written by Javert? Apparently Simplice was so pure that literally everything about her was white. Is this too far back in time for there to be Unfortunate Implications? Simplice of Sicily. I know we’re supposed to be in awe of martyrs but I just really can’t respect someone willing to die horrribly rather than lie about where they were born. I’ll lie about where I was born right now for literally nothing. I was born in Argentina. Damn it, Hugo! Liking to receive letters is not a character flaw! Upon consulting with some experts (notably melannen), it has been postulated that perhaps liking to receive letters is a euphemism. She could be addicted to crack fics, was on the nineteenth century version of IRC when she should have been praying, or writing porn with a friend. I wonder if Simplice liked Fantine at first. I feel she must have, somehow, because she is so honest that she won’t even tell a lie of omission so if she is judging you you would know all about it immediatley. I wonder why she was Madeleiene’s first choice for Fantine’s nurse. I mean, I know it worked out but it doesn’t seem like it would automatically. Fantine is apparently only alive when Madeleine is there. Not healthy and not very grateful to Sister Simplice. I guess Madeleine figures he’s not lying to her if he only says he’ll get Cosette “soon” and answers with one word not specifying what soon is relative to. I wish we could know more about Madeleine’s manner towards Fantine. I mean, he’s guilt-stricken and they’re both terribly socially awkward as well as her dying mysteriously of something or other. If Sister Simplice is around, she probably finds it dreadfully awkward and tells them so. Still don’t ship Fantine/Madeleine. He’s trying to spoil her as she dies. I wonder what the non-Javert members of town think about it. I wonder if Bamatabois even connects this incident with himself. And he’s saying goodbye by staying an hour instead of half an hour even if he doesn’t realize it. I wonder what he’s up to. Commentary Doeskin-pantaloons The sisters have to use weird names, because that’s kind of a thing in the Catholic Church. I have known a sister called Scholastica, and I have an aunt who took Francois (as in the male name) when she became a nun. I’m actually quite surprised this women still have female names, because from what I understood it was only with Vatican II that that kind of became okay. But that was probably just for specific orders. But basically - nuns take weird names, because the Catholic Church is weird. Pilferingapples The idea of Simplice writing round-robin Bible fanfic with her friends is…not an idea that will leave me soon. In related news, laughing hot coffee out of your nose is painful. Less goofily, maybe Simplice wasn’t personally fond of Fantine at first, but caring about someone in a nurse-ish way generally doesn’t require a friend-type affection. I’m sure Simplice was very properly devoted to Fantine from the start because Duty and God’s Creatures and things. And then Fantine turned out to be all Supermom so they could be friends, too? (also this is possibly the most awkward possible chapter to turn into a shipping chart, oh my GOSH, I cannot stop laughing. ”If Javert weren’t trauamtized by breasts” indeed!)